6.15.2011

If You Give a Mom a Plunger

If you give a mom a plunger...
Time to make the donuts.

After I unplug the toilet.

It could be worse. It could always be worse.

For instance, the 5 days with no internet access. Which means no work communication, or rather one-way communication with no response from me. Not smart. And no Facebook for teens which is apparently inhumane treatment.

But I will not complain, as we have power and water and a town still standing, and there's no tree splitting my house in half.

The early dismissal due to HEAT (2 days), was quite enjoyable, because for the first time EVAH, rather attractive husband was sent into a tailspin because his working wife, moi, was out of town on BUSINESS. Yup. That's right.

But he's got karma, that bald one.


Somehow he rigged me into a mid-90s flashback, back when I, home with babies and bloody cracked nipples and a back-upped toilet and wicked bad snowstorm and no snow tires or plow service, and for some reason bats in the bedroom come to mind, while he's lounging in New Orleans during a Sports Illustrated swim suit photoshoot (coincidence? I think not) claiming to miss his family back home.

Enter June 2011. He's away and this morning, I awoke to dog puke (3 piles) probably from the garbage he ransacked throughout the garage; a nasty-ass backed up toilet (DO NOT FLUSH TAMPONS GOD DAMN IT); a must-attend field day where we need 100 water balloons but the hose is slit and leaking after being under 17 feet of snow all season and apparently there's no manual on filling these things or an age-cap which I clearly exceed. Oh, and it's finals weeks where the teens here are a little on edge. Just a lil' bit.

And oh yeah, there's the work thing. I'm on deadline for a terrific marketing project that pays quite well, but a loser client has emerged from the ashes and is stalking me virtually and literally and asking for obscene amounts of work with little notice and less pay.

Which I will do. After I clean up the dog puke. Which will undoubtedly lead to mom puke. Which will most likely clog up the toilet.

To give a mouse a cookie...or a moose a muffin... or a mom a plunger.

6 comments:

  1. It sounds like you need a nap and it isn't even noon Hang in there!

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  2. eh, i say screw 'em all and go to a day spa. seriously, how much can one person take (be it man or woman or super mom)? I've got a client that's causing me to literally dream about them. they're making me nuts. I send them emails on thursday of what i need on monday and i get it on the following thursday and i'm expected to be done friday? WTF? time to fire the client. congrats on the marketing project. hope you can crawl through all the shit quickly enough not to miss out.

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  4. @Birdie -- survived! no nap necessary!

    @vanita -- day spa? whazthat? i got one of those clients; trying to decide how to break free.

    @GLC - ((awwww, shucks..blush,blush))

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  5. I loved 'But he's got karma, that bald one' LOL :o)

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  6. I'm making the donuts as fast as I can for Pete's sake!

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