Ann Taylor LOFT: Kiss My Oozing Thighs

Apparently their phones, email and cust service don't work.
Let me say this first. I like LOFT clothes. I like that fact that I can try something on and it fits. And I often look swell. And people that shop there aren't saying words like "swell" quite yet, but neither are they sexting their boyfriends.

The perfect stop for moms that want to remember life before yoga pants. A grown up world without being old fogey; chic clothes for cool working women, which I kinda sorta am, I guess.

I completely understand that many consider LOFT the discounted, cheapo version of Ann Taylor. But let's be real here: it's not cheap. It's not Bergdorf's, but it's no Target or Walmart either. It costs a butt load more than H&M which has equally chic clothes, but with a hip factor through the roof. Unfortunately, H&M pants haven't been made for hips that birthed 4 kids. (Ew, I said birthed. That's just wrong.)

Every so often I grab my coupons and venture into LOFT. The ladies are nice, they smell good, and haven't given me that 8th-grade-mean-girl-up-and-down-you-don't-belong-here look since I started showering before shopping. And the clothes do look good not only on mannequins, but on mid-life mamas as well.

So a few weeks back, I bought a great pair of little Lucille Ball cropped pants for a sale price of $39.99. I cut off the tags last Friday and finally wore them to a meeting. NOTE: these pants fit. They did not fit tight, no VPL, no camel toe, no wedgie. They are adorable, and I did not resemble in the least a frumpy, dog-walking, tennis playing, coffee drinking return-to-work mom. I love them. I don't say that often. I don't say that ever.

It was halfway through the meeting that I noticed the thigh ooze squeezing out of not one, but two holes on the inner seam. If the tears connected – it'd be party over. My thighs would spill over the chair like oil in the gulf. Not pretty and the damage long lasting and immeasurable.

LOFT pants with thigh ooze.
This was embarrassing. I work from pjs at home, and meet with real people once, maybe twice a month. MAYBE. My one time out of the house and my thighs are busting loose – not from my Target wow-I-got-these-for-12-bucks-pants, but my grown-up, I can play with the big girls now $39.99 LOFT slacks. You read that correctly; I called them slacks.

What'd I do? I took the crap pants back the next day, I did. And a nice smelling LOFT lady at the counter asked for the three week old receipt, which I of course didn't have, but I did have the tags fished from the garbage and the little metal security tag sewn inside to irritate your chub rub.

With no receipt, nice lady offered me a whopping $9.99. 

LOFT didn't have my size to exchange. There were none on-line. The manager was out of the store (but I swear she was cowering in the dressing room, waiting for me to leave). I asked if I could get them repaired and have LOFT pick up the tab? Nice smelling lady didn't know, but LOFT manager would return my call when she returned (from cowering in the dressing room).

It's been six days. No word. Nothing.

I left my home, cell, email contact information. I was a cool, calm, content customer returning a defective garment. I apologized for not holding onto a receipt for three weeks, for tags I pulled from the garbage, for being difficult and requesting, you know, the pants to hold up more than an hour after I put them on. They'd get back to me. She promised. But so far, nothing. Nada. Zero. Zilch.

I took the pants to the tailor to fix the seam, and I'll hold onto that receipt should LOFT care to do the right thing, but am not holding my breath. I'd like to boycott this crappy customer service experience, but I sometimes need to look like a grown up. I hate to shop and LOFT is easy, but the quality apparently sucks, as does the customer service. Sure wish my ass wasn't too big for H&M.

Anybody out there got a LOFT story? A customer service success? A nightmare? Do share.


  1. Is this the one in Southbury? I'm really surprised to hear it. I actually love that store, better than the one in the mall. They're always pleasant, and last time I was there the lady talked me into a hot little sweater dress I normally would never put on my body, and I *love* it! Don't give up on them! (And don't discount H&M for yourself, Kate. I have a bunch of stuff from there - if I can do it, you certainly can!)

  2. You crack me up taking everyday nightmares and making them funny, I went back and read some of you older posts and they are like "Modern Family", you can watch/read them over and over again and they always make me laugh

  3. stacey: they couldn't be nicer! They just never did anything but be nice. That doesn't do the job; i didn't need smiles, i needed a seamstress!

    anonymous: shucks.

  4. Sorry to hear about your problem with the Loft. I only hit the Loft Outlet every so often, but I am suprised to hear that they would not help you. I always considered LOFT to be a step up from even Macy's. I guess I should be glad I am not a regular shopper there. By the way, great post. I almost fell off my chair laughing.

  5. hey michelle! they are/were very nice. They nicely offered me $9.99 for $40 pants. And promised the mgr would call next day (last friday). All smiles and unicorns. Enuf to make me, well, blog!

  6. I used to work in retail and always knew this: A customer will share a great experience with one or two friends. A customer will share a bad experience with 20 friends and that will grow exponentially. Shame on you Loft. It's pretty darn easy to make a customer happy and you couldn't even make a phone call. pathetic

  7. you're so right nancy! i'm gonna blog about the good stuff soon; believe it or not, Loft aside, i've recently had a run in of GOOD customer service. that'll be fun to write, and i won't pound the keys nearly as hard! thx for smart comment!!

  8. I'm laughing too hard to type well. Raw deal. I mean thighs. I want to hear that they called and gave you a "What Not to Wear" LOFT card for 5 grand or at least the whole value of the slacks. The Store Manager surely doesn't wear the pants.

  9. raw deal, like raw tuna flesh, 'cept it was kateflesh. Nice, huh? won't hear a thing, i'm sure. they screwed me once before, couple years ago over not on sale but was on sale but coupon dated post sale so bring back receipt and we'll adjust but failed to do so cuz i brought back receipt and not clothes. Huff. And then they were RUDE. This time, they were all smiles and unicorns. Last time they sent me the same 20% off coupon that started the argument. But damn, the pants are cute! I sent to tailor and will model when returned, sans fleshy reveal. IMYA

  10. Wow, incredible post! Thanks for making me laugh so hard I cried. Will definitely be reading more of your posts!

  11. to mom2girls from mom3girls1boy, glad to have you! and really glad you found me funny. much prefer funny to pissy, but have been guilty of both -- thankfully more the prior!

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  13. I work at LOFT as a Sales Associate and I'm rather taken back as how the dealt with it. They should have been able to see if any other store has them through an option called "Style Finder." From there it would be possible to exchange the damaged pair at the same price. Upon receiving the new pair you could have always returned the undamaged exchanged pair for the price you paid. We aren't allowed to give the costumer full price without the receipt which is understandable but now we have the option to look it up if you entered your email at the end :) Sorry you had to go through this but please do understand that some of us want to try our best to help you even if we appear busy :) Hope this helps now.

    1. Hi lisa! this happened a couple years back, and while Loft didn't handle ideally at the time, I know most employees are customer oriented and realize the error of their ways. I have since shopped there again, with great satisfaction!